No – to whatever it is!

March 31, 2009

I have done no reading around the subject, I know nothing about the aims of the loose coalition of anarchists, enviromentalists, anti-capitalists, families, Tony Robinson, communists, socialist workers, neo-cons, and anti-war protesters, so what follows might be very unfair. 

But it does remind me of this:

father_ted_001_003_002_0011
“Careful now” /  “Down with this sort of thing”

What exactly are people protesting against? Is it some woolly idea of the ‘modern world’ that’s the problem? Are they protesting about the fact that the leaders of the biggest economies are getting together to try and figure out a solution to the current economic situation so that as many people as possible keep their jobs, homes, etc, and countries to find a better way of trading with each other?

And if they feel so strongly as to march the streets of London (and put some turf on a statue of Winston Churchill no doubt) where were these protesters where when the economy was booming?

Do these learned global financial strategists  have any suggestions about a better  system could be implemented – or are they just marching for ‘better financial regulation’ and a law to get ‘Sir Fred’s money off him?

And should I perhaps not come into work wearing my pinstripe, bowler hat and walking cane?

Just wondering!


The Apprentice – Sralan’s opening speech (annotated)

March 26, 2009

Good morning ladies and gentleman, welcome to my boardroom.

Morning Sralan!

Now then, the astute ones amongst you will have noticed that the chaps are one man short. There are eight girls and only seven boys and that’s because someone’s already bottled it. Believe it or not.

That someone is clearly a loser, but no back up contestant available?

You can’t even blame me, cos I’ve never met him

Embarrassing sycophantic laughter from the mass of Apprenti.

Pressure. That’s what business is all about. Pressure. Simple as that.

Um, this is where the central premise falls down a bit. Business is not ‘about’ pressure, it’s generally about running, or working for, an organisation that provides services or goods in the expectation of making money. This money is then used by the organisation to allow it to invest in it’s activities, pay shareholders, employees and cover it’s running costs. Depending on your industry (and seniority) the pressure levels can certainly be high, but it’s not business’ raison d’etre, and most businesses function better if people aren’t over-stressed. Stress causes bad decision making and illness.

Are you tough enough to put up with it? Cos matey wasn’t.

Yeah – what a loser! Ha ha.

This job interview is like one you’ve never had before.

This is very true. I can’t think of many job interviews that require relentless arguing with 15 other dimwits for 12 whole weeks in the full glare of television and other mainstream media to get an unspecified job position within a business whose main activity these days is not clear.

I’m gonna find out if you’re the real deal or just a bunch of empty designer suits and dresses.

Sralan, Sralan, they are exactly empty designer suits and dresses!! I thought that was the point, and fun, of the programme. Bit unfair to surprise them with this revelation now.

It could be, of course, that you’re here because you’re good with words, you know the right thing to say at the right time.

Like Sralan, I hate people who are good with words and are able to use them to express their thoughts at the appropriate time. Those people are wankers and Sralan should keep a beady eye for anyone who knows how to string a sentence together that suits a particular situation. Fuckers.

I mean I know the words to Candle in the Wind, don’t make me Elton John, right?

(nervous sycophantic laughter). A superb and funny…meaningless non sequitor.

I don’t care where you’re from, what you’re last job was.

Hear hear! Past experience of work should have absolutely no bearing on matters when being assessed for a new role.

Don’t tell me you’re a ‘Global Strategist’, cos all that means to me is that you’re talking a load of balls.

Bit tortured and only mildly amusing.

You think you can second guess or play me? Well, let me tell you I’m as hard to play as a Stradivarius.

Ha ha, now this was a great joke! I laughed very loudly and rolled around on the floor a bit.

And you lot, I can assure you, are as easy to play as bongo drums.

Hey now – referee! That is out of order! Bongos are as difficult to play as any other Western instrument you care to mention. This comment just harks back to unlovely ideas of primitive foreign cultures. We’ve moved on a bit since then, Sralan, get with the times – you should have said swanee whistle or kazoo.

All I care about is how you perform in the next 12 weeks. It’ll be the hardest job interview you’ve ever had.

True dat.

But for one of you, it might be the last one you ever need.

But what are all the past winners doing??? They never give us proper follow ups – it’s as bad as Dragon’s Den in this respect.

So, what am I looking for? Simple: a diamond. And remember a diamond started out as a lump of coal, but came good under extreme pressure.

Splendid rhetorical flourish, but not at all true. Diamonds and coal are both indeed created from carbon-bearing materials, but one is not created from the other. Coal is made from living matter relatively recently (400m years), but diamonds are created from non-organic carbon deep in the mantle and are much much older (2.5bn years). Shut up, this stuff is both interesting and important.

And trust me, you are going be under extreme pressure over the next twelve weeks.

Mos def.

So, it’s straight down to business…

Yey! I love this programme!!!

Disappointing catty arguments at the end of this first episode. Haven’t any of the contestants watched the programme before?

Anita – shut your mouth before he…oh, too late. Bye then!

The Apprentice on BBC iPlayer


The Charm of Squirrel

March 25, 2009

thecharmofsquirrel1

…and with a coat made of Giraffe kid, you too can obey Fashion’s Slimness Decree this spring.

Oh – this is from 1927, before all you young gals dash down to Selfridges for the sale of the century.  What a swizz!


Is Roger Scruton Beautiful?

March 22, 2009

No.

I gather Mr Scruton & David Starkey convincingly lost the debate on Thursday “Has Britain become indifferent to beauty?”

I further gather that Germaine Greer & Stephen Bayley knocked them into a cocked hat. Would have been quite fun to see. I last saw Mr Scruton being knocked into a cocked hat at the debate “Would we be better off without religion?’. With Christopher Hitchins, Richard Dawkins and AC Grayling on the one side and R. Scruton,  Nigel Spivey and the  Rabbi Julia Neuberger on the other, the motion didn’t stand much chance. Good knock about fun, and here’s a write up of it from someone on the losing side: http://mail.psychedelic-library.org/pipermail/theharderstuff/20070612/003392.html

Anyway, is Britain indifferent to beauty? The question is very badly phrased because to agree with it would be to say that no one in Britain ever thinks about beauty or would like more of it. That would be nonsense of course, so the motion was quashed. A better question might have been “Is there too much ugliness around” (probably yes), “could Britain afford to spend a bit more time thkning about beauty and making it a higher priority?”. Again, yes, hard to disagree with.

However, Screwballs and co seem to just dislike everything about the modern world and everything it stands for. This is a bit pathetic…as annoying as Hollyoaks, advertising hoardings and Lada GaGa are, you can’t just give up and dismiss everything, as there is also Punch Drunk, Arthur Ganson and On Rails out there.

You just got to look a bit harder Screwy, and widen your perspective beyond the late 19th century, yeah?

Guardian article


Bravo Stewart Lee

March 18, 2009

Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle. BBC 2 Monday

Is it is me, or is there a sea change? Are people finally getting bored with crap telly, books and music?

One can only dream.


Stewart Lee’s opening salvo in his new BBC series ‘Comedy Vehicle’, however, was a breath of fresh air.

He laid into Harry Potter ‘and the crock of shit’ / ‘and the pot of paint’ / ‘and the tree of nothing’, explaining out that if anyone ever asked him if he’d read the lastest Potter, he would say, ‘Of course not, fuck off – it’s a children’s book’. Adding that he had read the entire works of the mystic and poet William Blake, but no, had not read Harry Crappy Potter. Because it’s a book for CHILDREN.


Even more spendidly he gave Asher D, the ex-rapping man from the So Solid Crew, ‘maximum disrespect’ as he tore his celebratory hardback into metaphorical shreds. In fact, he looked straight at the camera and said ‘Asher D – if you’re watching – I am giving you disrespect. Maximum disrespect.’


The man’s a dude. He doesn’t quite have Bill Hicks’ level of fury at the human race, but seems to come from a similar place of anger and irritation at much of commerical culture. It’s an overdue attack on the mediocre dross of popular culture – let’s hope people like Lee, and others, make it unpopular culture and move us to a higher level of human ambition.


Yeah!


(this clip not from his current series:):


Stereogrammatical (& drumming)

March 10, 2009

During the recording session on Saturday in which I recorded some drums for Cassette, I inadvertently created my favourite visual stereo effect:

Yey – even with a 2d screen, there is a strong stereo vision effect, simply by alternating two slightly different viewpoints. I am determined to make a pop video one day exploiting this effect. (The Flippers had a quick go a while back: http://www.deathtotheflippers.com/2007/05/07/three-dee-two/ & http://www.deathtotheflippers.com/2007/04/25/thhreee-deee/)

Here’s proof that I was recording real drums with the splendid and talented Martin of Moeker:

I expect some ‘people’ might think it ‘amusing’ that I had an article published in Sound on Sound slamming the use of drums in electro, and here I am now recording drums for electro. Those people are of course right to be amused, I just like the taste of my own hats, that’s all.


Geeking and Popping

March 7, 2009

Armed with only some sinewaves, a vintage valve oscilloscope, the Flippers and an incurable fascination with visualising sound a thing has been produced. It is a sort of musical thing with a sort of visual thing.

It’s been accepted into the virtual festival GeekPop.

It’s like an amazing rock video without the rock. You’ll love it because it’s lovely.

img_0308


Geeking and Popping

March 7, 2009

Armed with only some sinewaves, a vintage valve oscilloscope, the Flippers and an incurable fascination with visualising sound a thing has been produced. It is a sort of musical thing with a sort of visual thing.

It’s been accepted into the virtual festival GeekPop.

You can see it here: http://geekpop.podbean.com/2009/experimental/onrails

It’s like an amazing rock video without the rock. You’ll love it because it’s lovely.

img_0308


I present you with a cycling lol.

March 5, 2009

Sine Language

March 1, 2009

The harmonic content of pure oscillator tones generated by a Moog synthesizer – sine wave, saw tooth & square wave:

Sine wave on a Moog synthesizer

Sine wave

Sine wave (above): The fundamental can be seen at about 150hz as a strong white line

Sawtooth on a Moog synthesizer

Sawtooth wave

Squarewave on a Moog synthesizer

Square wave

Sawtooth Wave & Square Wave (above): Both produce many — and different — harmonics giving rise to their distinct sounds

As an electronic musician I’ve always been fascinated by sine waves. They were present on my first Moog synthesiser as a sound generator option, and when sampling became available in the late 80s I learnt that any sound can be broken down into its constituent sine waves using Fourier analysis, and then reconstructed again. (Find out more about Fourier analysis in the Plus
podcast.) Virtually every sound heard today from any digital device — from HDTV to the iPod — is described as a sum of its sine wave parts in the digital realm.

Sine waves are unique in that they are the only sound in nature not to contain any harmonics beyond their fundamental frequency — they are the vampires of the sound world casting no harmonic shadow or reflections.

The piece of music I wrote for the Geekpop Festival, Sine Language, explores the idea of sine waves, and how they relate to other concepts such as the Western tuning system known as equal temperament, and even to ancient Greek cosmological ideas (listen to Sine
Language
).

Making music

Sine waves are fascinating because they are theoretically perfect — they contain no harmonics above their fundamental frequency (or in musical terms, their pitch). Because of this, several overlaid sine waves of particular pitches aren’t always interpreted as discrete tones by the ear, but as just one sound whose timbre is modulating. The first minute or so of Sine Language introduces 7
differently pitched sine waves one by one, starting low and ending high. These 7 tones — which comprise the first half of the piece — are tuned to perfect fifths. This is unusual because fifths on a piano keyboard are actually not perfect. To understand why this is, a brief diversion on the history of Western tuning is required — starting with the ancient Greeks.

Apocryphally it was Pythagoras who noticed that harmonious notes were created by a blacksmith striking particular sized anvils, and this got him thinking about the mathematical principles of harmony. He went on to discover that dividing a string in two and plucking it produces a note that is double the original pitch of the string. So if the original string vibrates 500 times a second (i.e. a
frequency of 500Hz), and the length of the string is halved it will vibrate at double the frequency — that is 1000 times a second (1000Hz)

Two sine waves of the same amplitude, one<br>half the frequency of the other

Image above: Two sine waves of the same amplitude, one half the frequency of the other

Musically, this means that we hear the 1000Hz tone as double the pitch of the 500Hz tone — this is called an octave. If you were to play both tones together, they would sound harmonious because for every one vibration of the 500Hz tone, you can fit the 1000Hz tone in twice. Our ears and brain interpret this as pleasant sounding — perhaps because it takes fewer receptors in our ears to
interpret and pass the information to the auditory part of the brain.

But a ratio of one to two is not the only ratio our ears interpret as harmonious. In one of those elegant surprises of nature, many other whole number ratios also sound pleasant to us, and by including other ratios you can construct a scale known as just intonation:

Musical interval Ratio of frequencies
C-D 9:8
C-E 5:4
C-F 4:3
C-G 3:2
C-A 5:3
C-B 15:8
C-C 2:1

The ancient Greeks were so impressed with the neatness of this discovery, that they based a whole philosophy on it, which became known as the music of the spheres. At the time it was believed the orbits of the planets and the Sun were perfect circles centred on the Earth, and that these celestial objects moved in their orbits on crystal spheres. The spacing of these spheres were the
perfect mathematical ratios arising from musical intervals, and their movement against each other produced the music of the spheres. Though it was inaudible to human beings, it represented the perfection of the universe.

The Ancient Greek concept of Celestial Spheres

The ancient Greek concept of celestial spheres


However, beautiful as this idea is, there are several problems with dividing a scale up using just intonation and there have been many different attempts to solve it — but a permanent solution wasn’t found in the West until the 17th century.

Musically, the system of perfect ratios only works if you wish to remain in one key. As can be seen in the table of C major (above), all the notes are tuned perfectly for the key of C. So any piece of music you wish to write will have to start on C, end on C, and only use the white notes of the keyboard if it is going to sound “right”. This is because if you were to start on D, all the
equivalent ratios for the notes on the scale would be completely different, or in musical terminology, horrible sounding! On our keyboard tuned (using just intonation) to the key of C, the notes D and A have frequencies of 9/8 and 5/3 times the frequency of C. But according to just intonation, a perfect fifth above D is 3/2 times its frequency, which is 27/16 times the frequency of C (3/2 times
9/8); this is close to, but not exactly the frequency of A (5/3 times the frequency of C) on our keyboard. And this is before we even consider the black keys and how they should fit into the scheme. (For more discussion on mathematical ratios of musical notes read Music and Euclid’s Algorithm.)

One can imagine that staying in the key of C and using only the white notes is somewhat boring and can produce only a limited range of tonal variation. Musicians are generally adventurous types, not content with simply replicating what went before, and by the 1600s various systems had been developed in the West to allow for more movement among the keys. Such movement is called modulation, and
to find a system that allowed modulation between all the keys, say from C to D, without the key of D sounding completely awful was very difficult. Technically these out of tune notes were called wolf notes and were the bane of baroque and earlier composers.

A harpsichord (circa 1620) with split black notes tuned to sound good in different keys (Image courtesy <a href='http://www.music.ed.ac.uk/euchmi/'>Edinburgh University Collection of Historic Musical Instruments</a>)

Iamge above: A harpsichord (circa 1620) with split black notes tuned to sound good in different keys (Image courtesy Edinburgh University Collection of Historic Musical Instruments)

After the various attempts to solve this problem (including building piano keyboards with split black notes so the correctly tuned one could be picked for the key you were in, see picture above) the solution used today, called equal temperament, is the perfect compromise: keep all the octave ratios of 2:1 perfect, but average out all of the other notes of the scale. This means that
instead of one key being perfect and the others being wrong in their own unique and horrible way, all the keys are equally slightly wrong, but in such a way that is acceptable for all possible keys.

In mathematical terms this simply means that each of the 12 semitones in an octave are 1/12th of an octave higher or lower than their neighbours. The amount of detuning away from the “perfect” is sometimes referred to as the Pythagorean gap in deference to the original Greek idea of harmonic perfection.

Before equal temperament came what were known as well temperament systems. These were similar in that they allowed free modulation across keys, but weren’t quite so mathematically precise. For example, Werckmeister’s systems of the late 17th century involved specifying various flattenings and sharpenings of fifths and thirds. However, despite these not being the best mathematical
solution, they were sufficient for JS Bach to write the 48 Preludes and Fugues, in which there is one piece for each and every possible scale, major and minor, on the keyboard. This ability to write in different keys — and to modulate between them in the same piece — was simply not possible before well temperament was invented.

What all of the above means is that we are very used to hearing music in equal temperament and the sound of a perfectly tuned scale is quite unfamiliar and can even sound wrong to our ears. All this connects back to my piece as I’ve used a whole number ratio to generate the fifth note of the scale which produces a harmony more closely related to the Greek perfect harmony than the more recent
equal temperament.

Writing Sine Language

The first half of Sine Language is constructed from just seven notes that are differently tuned sine waves:

  1. The fundamental — a B♭ with a frequency of 116.541hz
  2. The fundamental frequency times 2 (an octave higher)
  3. The fundamental frequency times 3 (a fifth above note 2)
  4. The fundamental frequency times 4 (two octaves above the fundamental)
  5. The fundamental frequency times 6 (a fifth above note 4)
  6. The fundamental frequency times 8 (three octaves above the fundamental)
  7. The fundamental frequency times 12 (a fifth above note 6)

A close up of the score of <i>Sine Language</i>

A close up of the score of Sine Language showing the wave forms of each note.  The ratios of the perfect fifths (3:2) and octaves (2:1) can be easily seen — the top wave, note 7, completes 3 cycles in the time note 6 complete 2 cycles, and note 6 completes 2 cycles in the time note 4 completes 1.

So the fundamental has been multiplied by a sequence of whole numbers: the frequency of every second note is multiplied by two (to go up an octave), and the notes in between have frequencies 3/2 times higher (perfect fifths). This is an arbitrary decision based on the fact that most music uses these numbers — 2, 3 and 4 — a great deal: time signatures usually have either 3 or 4 beats per bar
length, and often musical phrases are built up in multiples of 4 or 8 bar chunks (and sections, especially in classical music, tend to be 16, 32 or 64 bars long). It would require another essay to investigate the reason for powers of 2 to be so “natural sounding” in music, or whether it’s simply convention (other world cultures do use other systems).

The other simple mathematical idea of the first half is to use the same mathematical sequence to define the rhythm. I’ve simply decided that there should be one “perfect” bar in the piece of music towards which the first half builds and that the second half of the piece then uses this perfect bar as a launchpad for more freeform composition. This bar can be defined as the follows:

The 'perfect' bar: showing the rhythmic patterns<br>of each note

The ‘perfect’ bar: showing the rhythmic patterns of each note

  • Note 1 sounds once a bar
  • Note 2 sounds twice a bar
  • Note 3 sounds three times a bar
  • Note 4 sounds four times a bar
  • Note 5 sounds six times a bar
  • Note 6 sounds eight times bar
  • Note 7 sounds twelve times a bar

Musically this has the effect of layering triplets over duplets, a not-uncommon technique used in much music. Romantic music of the late 19th century does this all the time as the effect is to speed up or slow notes down against the pulse, but in such a way to be musically pleasing. For example you can play three notes in the time it would normally take to play two (known as a triplet) and
still end up in the right place in the bar for the next note. As doing this goes against the predominant pulse it is pleasantly surprising without totally disrupting the flow of the music.

In the case of the “perfect” bar I have described above, it sets up a pleasing pulsating sound which sounds cohesive yet clearly made up of discrete elements: you can listen to the bar (repeated several times) here.

The added twist is that the individual notes comprising this cascade of sound are tuned in a non-standard way, but because they are whole tone and whole number ratios, they still sound harmonious — if slightly unusual to the trained ear.

The first half of the piece, then, builds up to this defining bar by gradually introducing the pattern into the music. One by one the sine waves are introduced and gradually shift from a gentle volume wax and wane to a discrete jump in volume from zero to maximum. A shift from fuzzy analogue “in-between” volumes to binary states of off and on.

The diagram below is in fact the score of the first half of the piece and shows how these shifts take place. However, they are quite hard to hear as the ear tends to merge sine waves into a composite sound so that what you experience is subtly shifting harmonic content — at least up until the point where all the sine waves have reached the perfect bar and the distinct pitches are audible.

The score of <i>Sine Language</i>

The score of Sine Language: you can see the gradually introduction of the 7 notes, and the introduction of the rhythm note by note, starting from the fundamental at the bottom of the score. (Click on image for larger version)

The second half of the piece is where the perfect bar is placed in a sampler — a musical device that can replay any sound at any pitch by slowing it down or speeding it up to the correct frequency. This technique has become so ubiquitous over the last 20 years that I hardly need to provide an example of how it works, but here is the perfect bar played back by a sampler, first at its orginal pitch, and then at different pitches, descending by an octave each time.

The second half of the piece is more arbitrarily musical than mathematical — once in the sampler, it can be ‘played’ as if it were a normal sound, such as the piano. Because of the nature of the sound though, the effect of playing chords with it is to create an interweaving, interlocking web of pulsating sine waves at mathematically interesting pitches, and certainly not those of equal
temperament. You can listen to the whole piece here.

Video directed by the flippers.

One catch, however, is that the sampler does play back the pitches at equal temperament (as this is the tuning system that the sampler uses), so the resultant music in this section is a perfectly tuned bar played back at equally tempered pitch intervals. The resulting tuning is therefore impossibly complicated, and I think should be simply described as the Pythagorean gap squared!

What completes the circle for me is that the culminated effect of the overlayed sine waves and tunings remind me of a JS Bach organ work, possibly even one of the fugues from the 48, and it pleases me that although this has been arrived at by a mathematical process, it has tended towards a similar output. Though I should hastily point out that I’m in no way claiming any of Bach’s genius and
understanding of harmony and melody — this is a passing (if happy) musical similarity!

First published in Plus Magazine March 2009.